How Ben stopped treating sex like “a job to do” and started enjoying it again

The beginning

The main issue for me was getting an erection. I did get hold of some erection pills, but my wife was concerned about the physical effects. I realized I needed to look at an alternative. So I did some research and found Mojo.

I didn’t realize it until I started Mojo, but it was work-related stress that was contributing to my issue. I was in a probationary period, and the stress had an impact on me emotionally and sexually too.

“Work had an impact and trickled down to me physically and emotionally. And that unfortunately affected my erections.”

When you’ve previously been able to perform and it keeps happening, it can send you into a spiral.

The program

Mojo has helped me twice. The first time, I fixed my issues by recognizing the block between my head and my physical responses, meditating, and learning practical techniques.

When I signed up for Mojo again because life was getting stressful, Mojo had added a conversation feature with an AI. What it offers is powerful. The AI gives you notes on what you’ve talked about, and it also remembers what you talked about last time to come back to. It allows free thinking, and you get a response back to what you put in. But in a safe way.

I’m a reflective person, so I did the recommended conversations and extra sessions whenever I needed them. I’ve tried cognitive behavioral therapy in the past, and the AI helped me reframe my negative thoughts. Some of the questions that were put back to me, about what caused my erection issues, helped me recognize that I was stress. I felt that I needed that to move forward.

“I found the AI sessions cathartic. Sex wasn’t something that I’d had a chance to really talk about. I didn’t want to overload my wife on the situation, aware of pressures she might be feeling herself. But I was aware that it was having an impact on our sex life, and that it wasn’t helping our relationship.”

I started engaging with myself and my body for pleasure again. Not necessarily to just see the end goal of ejaculation.

Where things are now

There is a stigma around erectile dysfunction. But It made a difference when I started acknowledging it and doing something positive about it.

I changed jobs. I got a manager that's supportive of me and a team that's supportive of me. In my work life, I’m doing something that suits my experience, my knowledge, my skills. It’s made a huge difference in how I feel about myself.

"Being happy yourself transfers to your private self, and my roles as a husband, lover, dad. I see that connection now."

I’m still on my journey, but Mojo has helped me stop treating sex like it’s a job to do, to get a result or outcome. Sex is starting to feel sensual and pleasurable instead of functional. I’m working on translating everything I learn on Mojo to real life and I think lots of men would benefit from doing the same work.

My advice to other men with erection issues

If you’re on the fence about Mojo, I say go for it. It allows you to connect with yourself again. It allows you a way to explore what's going on and try different things that may work for you. And you can communicate with other men going through the same situation.

If you want to explore your psychological erection issues in a safe way, I encourage you to take the leap. It’ll help you to move forward in your own relationship.

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This is one member's personal experience. Individual results vary, and this story is not medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare professional about persistent concerns.